Ah, the diaper bag. Nothing makes a bolder statement about parenthood than the giant bag slung over your shoulder stuffed with diapers, burp clothes and changes of clothing. Well, maybe the spit-up drying on your back makes a statement, too, but the diaper bag can at least be fashionable.

The Bag

There are many styles of diaper bags available, from totes to backpacks and everything in between. The style of diaper bag you select has more to do with your personality and preferences than anything else. But be sure to think about both parents when selecting the bag, and opt for something that meshes with your style as your baby could care less if her bottles are toted in a trim black tote or a giant Winnie the Pooh bag.

Backpacks or messenger bags are great for parents who are always on the go and looking for an extra hand. By wearing the bag on your back, you have both hands free, but it does complicate things for parents who wear their babies or who like to grab or drop items in the bag at any moment.

Totes have easy access which is nice for parents who like to reach in and grab the pacifier without stopping, but that easy access also means your diaper bag may spill easily. Some totes come with zippers or flaps which can solve this problem. Diaper bags with flaps, however, can be frustrating if the flap is constantly falling in the way or if items fall out of the flap compartments when it is being lifted.

The Contents

Just as every child is different, the contents of every diaper bag are different. But speaking in generalities, when you pack your diaper bag, you should include the following:

Diapers – What would a diaper bag be without them? Load up the bag so you don’t always have to think about adding more.

Wipes – Invest in a travel size wipes dispenser to keep yourself organized.

Diaper Rash Ointment – If you use it at home, you’ll want it on the road.

Burp Cloth – You know why you need it.

Light Blanket – This can double as a burp cloth or keep your baby cozy in air conditioning or cooler weather.

Emergency Rations – Carry a nonperishable snack or two in the bag and a single serving sized can of formula along with an extra bottle should you be caught unawares.

Bottle of Water – The water is great for breastfeeding moms or parents on the go, but it can also be used in your emergency bottle if your older baby needs a drink or if you’re trying to mix powdered formula.

Meals – Any meals you’ll be eating while you’re away from home can be packed neatly into the diaper bag.

Bib – Throw in a regular bib or invest in the disposable ones.

Change of Clothes – Young babies or those learning to self-feed may want more than a single change of clothes.

Pacifier – The pacifier tends to disappear out of the bag after each outing, so be sure it’s replaced so you’re not stranded without one.

Toys – A few small toys can help keep your baby busy while sitting in a waiting room or in line at the grocery store.

It’s truly an amazing phenomenon. Even before many parents begin trying for a second baby, they begin worrying about the impact of that unconceived child on their oldest child. After all, the first born has been smothered with attention his entire life, how could he possibly understand (or tolerate) losing that esteemed position?

The worry continues throughout the pregnancy, but at least conscientious parents can use that energy in a productive way - they can prepare their toddler as much as possible.

Encourage Independence

As your toddler ages, he should be getting increasingly independent in his play, eating, and daily routines. Naturally he will prefer to play with you, and you should spend as much time as is reasonable playing with your child. But be sure to let him play independently, too. Find him interesting, developmentally appropriate toys and keep an eye on him while washing the dishes or taking care of a few things around the house. That independence will come in handy when you’re simply unable to feed an infant and amuse a toddler at the same time.

Play-Up Being a Big Kid

Your toddler may still seem like a baby to you, but take that word out of your vocabulary. He’s a Big Boy now, and Big Boys get to do all kinds of things that babies can’t. Help him eat his food like a Big Boy and show him how interesting the Big Boy toys are. Take him places only Big Boys can go.

Keep up this Big Boy training after the baby comes. He’ll likely want to play with the baby items when they start showing up around the house, and that’s okay. Let him play, but be sure that the Big Boy novelties are much more exciting, and he’ll be more content to leave the baby things to the baby.

Make Special Connections

You most likely already have some, but find even more ways to develop a special connection with your toddler. Sing a special song together. Invent a rhyme that is especially his. Sing His Song when you’re driving in the car or putting him to bed. Then, when the baby arrives, you might be changing a diaper, but you can sing your toddler’s special song together while you do it. This helps keep the attention on him as much as possible, and the baby simply enjoys the singing.